[O] James Parton.



IX.

LOVE AND COURTSHIP.

Learn to win a lady's faith Nobly, as the thing is high; Bravely, as for life and death, With a loyal gravity. Lead her from the festive boards; Point her to the starry skies; Guard her by your truthful words Pure from courtship's flatteries.—Mrs. Browning.

I.—A HINT OR TWO.

To treat the subject of love and courtship in all its bearings would require a volume. It is with the etiquette of the tender passion that we have to do here. A few preliminary hints, however, will not be deemed out of place.

Boys often fall in love (and girls too, we believe) at a very tender age. Some charming cousin, or a classmate of his sister, in the village school, weaves silken meshes around the throbbing heart of the young man in his teens. This is well. He is made better and happier by his boyish loves—for he generally has a succession of them, but they are seldom permanent. They are only beautiful foreshadowings of the deeper and more earnest love of manhood, which is to bind him to his other self with ties which only death can sever. Read Ik Marvel's "Dream Life."

Before a young man has reached the proper age to marry—say twenty-five, as an average—he ought to have acquired such a knowledge of himself, physically and mentally considered, and of the principles which ought to decide the choice of matrimonial partners and govern the relations of the sexes, as will enable him to set up a proper standard of female excellence, and to determine what qualities, physical and mental, should characterize the woman who is to be the angel of his home and the mother of his children. With this knowledge he is prepared to go into society and choose his mate, following trustingly the attractions of his soul. Love is an affair of the heart, but the head should be its privy counselor.

Do not make up your mind to wait till you have acquired a fortune before you marry. You should not, however, assume the responsibilities of a family without a reasonable prospect of being able to maintain one. If you are established in business, or have an adequate income for the immediate requirements of the new relation, you may safely trust your own energy and self-reliance for the rest.

Women reach maturity earlier than men, and may marry earlier—say (as an average age), at twenty. The injunction, "Know thyself," applies with as much emphasis to a woman as to a man. Her perceptions are keener than ours, and her sensibilities finer, and she may trust more to instinct, but she should add to these natural qualifications a thorough knowledge of her own physical and mental constitution, and of whatever relates to the requirements of her destiny as wife and mother. The importance of sound health and a perfect development, can not be overrated. Without these you are NEVER fit to marry.[P]

Having satisfied yourself that you really love a woman—be careful, as you value your future happiness and hers, not to make a mistake in this matter—you will find occasion to manifest, in a thousand ways, your preference, by means of those tender but delicate and deferential attentions which love always prompts. "Let the heart speak." The heart you address will understand its language. Be earnest, sincere, self-loyal, and manly in this matter above all others. Let there be no nauseous flattery and no sickly sentimentality Leave the former to fops and the latter to beardless school-boys.

Though women do not "propose"—that is, as a general rule—they "make love" to the men none the less; and it is right. The divine attraction is mutual, and should have its proper expression on both sides. If you are attracted toward a man who seems to you an embodiment of all that is noble and manly, you do injustice both to him and yourself if you do not, in some way entirely consistent with maiden modesty, allow him to see and feel that he pleases you. But you do not need our instructions, and we will only hint, in conclusion, that forwardness, flirting, and a too obtrusive manifestation of preference are not agreeable to men of sense. As a man should be manly, so should a woman be womanly in her love.

II.—OBSERVANCES.

1. Particular Attentions.

Avoid even the slightest appearance of trifling with the feelings of a woman. A female coquette is bad enough. A male coquette ought to be banished from society. Let there be a clearly perceived, if not an easily defined, distinction between the attentions of common courtesy or of friendship and those of love. All misunderstanding on this point can and must be avoided.

The particular attentions you pay to the object of your devotion should not make you rude or uncivil to other women. Every woman is her sister, and should be treated with becoming respect and attention. Your special attentions to her in society should not be such as to make her or you the subject of ridicule. Make no public exhibition of your endearments.

2. Presents.

If you make presents, let them be selected with good taste, and of such cost as is fully warranted by your means. Your mistress will not love you better for any extravagance in this matter. The value of a gift is not to be estimated in dollars and cents. A lady of good sense and delicacy will discourage in her lover all needless expenditure in ministering to her gratification, or in proof of his devotion.

3. Confidants.

Lovers usually feel a certain need of confidants in their affairs of the heart. In general, they should be of the opposite sex. A young man may with profit open his heart to his mother, an elder sister, or a female friend considerably older than himself. The young lady may with equal advantage make a brother, an uncle, or some good middle-aged married man the repository of her love secrets, her hopes, and her fears.

4. Declarations.

We shall make no attempt to prescribe a form for "popping the question." Each must do it in his own way; but let it be clearly understood and admit no evasion. A single word—yes, less than that, on the lady's part, will suffice to answer it. If the carefully studied phrases which you have repeated so many times and so fluently to yourself, will persist in sticking in your throat and choking you, put them correctly and neatly on a sheet of the finest white note paper, inclosed in a fine but plain white envelope (see "How to Write"), seal it handsomely with wax, address and direct it carefully, and find some way to convey it to her hand. The lady's answer should be frank and unequivocal, revealing briefly and modestly her real feelings and consequent decision.

5. Asking "Pa."

Asking the consent of parents or guardians is, in this country, where women claim a right to choose for themselves, a mere form, and may often be dispensed with. The lady's wishes, however, should be complied with in this as in all other matters. And if consent is refused? This will rarely happen. If it does, there is a remedy, and we should have a poor opinion of the love or the spirit of the woman who would hesitate to apply it. If she is of age, she has a legal as well as a moral right to bestow her love and her hand upon whom she pleases. If she does not love you well enough to do this, at any sacrifice, you should consider the refusal of her friends a very fortunate occurrence. If she is not of age, the legal aspect of the affair may be different, but, at worst, she can wait until her majority puts her in possession of all her rights.

6. Refusals.

If a lady finds it necessary to say "no" to a proposal, she should do it in the kindest and most considerate manner, so as not to inflict unnecessary pain; but her answer should be definite and decisive, and the gentleman should at once withdraw his suit. If ladies will my "no" when they mean "yes," to a sincere and earnest suitor, they must suffer the consequences.

7. Engagement.

The "engaged" need not take particular pains to proclaim the nature of the relation in which they stand to each other, neither should they attempt or desire to conceal it. Their intercourse with each other should be frank and confiding, but prudent, and their conduct in reference to other persons of the opposite sex, such as will not give occasion for a single pang of jealousy.

Of the "getting ready," which follows the engagement, on the part of the lady, our fair readers know a great deal more than we could tell them.

8. Breaking Off.

Engagements made in accordance with the simple and brief directions contained in the first section of this chapter, will seldom be broken off. If such a painful necessity occurs, let it be met with firmness, but with delicacy. If you have made a mistake, it is infinitely better to correct it at the last moment than not at all. A marriage is not so easily "broken off."

On breaking off an engagement, all letters, presents, etc., should be returned, and both parties should consider themselves pledged to the most honorable and delicate conduct in reference to the whole matter, and to the private affairs of each other, a knowledge of which their former relation may have put into their possession.

9. Marriage.

It devolves upon the lady to fix the day. She will hardly disregard the stereotyped request of the impatient lover to make it an "early" one; but she knows best how soon the never-to-be-neglected "preparations" can be made. For the wedding ceremonies see Chapter VII. A few hints to husbands and wives may be found in Chapter V.

FOOTNOTE:

[P] See "Physical Perfection; or How to Acquire and Retain Beauty, Grace, and Strength," now (1857) in the course of preparation.



X.

PARLIAMENTARY ETIQUETTE.

The object of a meeting for deliberation is, of course, to obtain a free expression of opinion and a fair decision of the questions discussed. Without rules of order this object would, in most cases, be utterly defeated; for there would be no uniformity in the modes of proceeding, no restraint upon indecorous or disorderly conduct, no protection to the rights and privileges of members, no guarantee against the caprices and usurpations of the presiding officer, no safeguard against tyrannical majorities, nor any suitable regard to the rights of the minority.—McElligott.

I.—COURTESY IN DEBATE.

The fundamental principles of courtesy, so strenuously insisted upon throughout this work, must be rigorously observed in the debating society, lyceum, legislative assembly, and wherever questions are publicly debated. In fact, we have not yet discovered any occasion on which a gentleman is justified in being anything less than—a gentleman.

In a paragraph appended to the constitution and by-laws of a New York debating club, members are enjoined to treat each other with delicacy and respect, conduct all discussions with candor, moderation, and open generosity, avoid all personal allusions and sarcastic language calculated to wound the feelings of a brother, and cherish concord and good fellowship. The spirit of this injunction should pervade the heart of every man who attempts to take part in the proceedings of any deliberative assembly.

II.—ORIGIN OF THE PARLIAMENTARY CODE.

The rules of order of our State Legislatures, and of other less important deliberative bodies, are, in almost all fundamental points, the same as those of the National Congress, which, again, are derived, in the main, from those of the British Parliament, the differences which exist growing out of differences in government and institutions. It is in allusion to its origin that the code of rules and regulations thus generally adopted is often called "The Common Code of Parliamentary Law."

III.—RULES OF ORDER.

1. Motions.

A deliberative body being duly organized, motions are in order. The party moving a resolution, or making a motion in its simplest form, introduces it either with or without remarks, by saying: "Mr. President, I beg leave to offer the following resolution," or "I move that," etc. A motion is not debatable till seconded. The member seconding simply says: "I second that motion." The resolution or motion is then stated by the chairman, and is open for debate.

2. Speaking.

A member wishing to speak on a question, resolution, or motion, must rise in his place and respectfully address his remarks to the chairman or president, confining himself to the question, and avoiding personality. Should more than one member rise at the same time, the chairman must decide which is entitled to the floor. No member must speak more than once till every member wishing to speak shall have spoken. In debating societies (and it is for their benefit that we make this abstract) it is necessary to define not only how many times, but how long at each time a member may speak on a question.

3. Submitting a Question.

When the debate or deliberation upon a subject appears to be at a close, the presiding officer simply asks, "Is the society [assembly, or whatever the body may be] ready for the question?" or, "Are you ready for the question?" If no one signifies a desire further to discuss or consider the subject, he then submits the question in due form.

4. Voting.

The voting is generally by "ayes and noes," and the answers on both sides being duly given, the presiding officer announces the result, saying, "The ayes have it," or, "The noes have it," according as he finds one side or the other in the majority. If there is a doubt in his mind which side has the larger number, he says, "The ayes appear to have it," or, "The noes appear to have it," as the case may be. If there is no dissent, he adds, "The ayes have it," or, "The noes have it." But should the president be unable to decide, or if his decision be questioned, and a division of the house be called for, it is his duty immediately to divide or arrange the assembly as to allow the votes on each side to be accurately counted; and if the members are equally divided, the president must give the casting vote. It is the duty of every member to vote; but in some deliberative bodies a member may be excused at his own request. Sometimes it is deemed advisable to record the names of members in connection with the votes they give, in which case the roll is called by the secretary, and each answers "yes" or "no," which is noted or marked opposite his name.

5. A Quorum.

A quorum is such a number of members as may be required, by rule or statute, to be present at a meeting in order to render its transactions valid or legal.

6. The Democratic Principle.

All questions, unless their decision be otherwise fixed by law, are determined by a majority of votes.

7. Privileged Questions.

There are certain motions which are allowed to supersede a question already under debate. These are called privileged questions. The following are the usually recognized privileged questions:

1. Adjournment.—A motion to adjourn is always in order, and takes precedence of all others; but it must not be entertained while a member is speaking, unless he give way for that purpose, nor while a vote is in progress. It is not debatable, and can not be amended.

2. To Lie on the Table.—A motion to lay a subject on the table—that is, to set it aside till it is the pleasure of the body to resume its consideration—generally takes precedence of all others, except the motion to adjourn. It can neither be debated nor amended.

3. The Previous Question.—The intention of the previous question is to arrest discussion and test at once the sense of the meeting. Its form is, "Shall the main question now be put?" It is not debatable, and can not be amended. An affirmative decision precludes all further debate on the main question. The effect of a negative decision, unless otherwise determined by a special rule, is to leave the main question and all amendments just as it found them.

4. Postponement.—A motion to postpone the consideration of a question indefinitely, which is equivalent to setting it aside altogether, may be amended by inserting a certain day. It is not debatable.

5. Commitment.—A motion to commit is made when a question, otherwise admissible, is presented in an objectionable or inconvenient form. If there be no standing committee to which it can be properly submitted, a select committee may be raised for the purpose. It may be amended.

6. Amendment.—The legitimate use of a motion to amend is to correct or improve the original motion or resolution; but a motion properly before an assembly may be altered in any way; even so as to turn it entirely from its original purpose, unless some rule or law shall exist to prevent this subversion. An amendment may be amended, but here the process must cease. An amendment must of course be put to vote before the original question. A motion to amend holds the same rank as the previous question and indefinite postponement, and that which is moved first must be put first. It may be superseded, however, by a motion to postpone to a certain day, or a motion to commit.

7. Orders of the Day.—Subjects appointed for a specified time are called orders of the day, and a motion for them takes precedence of all other business, except a motion to adjourn, or a question of privilege.

8. Questions of Privilege.—These are questions which involve the rights and privileges of individual members, or of the society or assembly collectively. They take precedence over all other propositions, except a motion to adjourn.

9. Questions of Order.—In case of any breach of the rules of the society or body, any member may rise to the point of order, and insist upon its due enforcement; but in case of a difference of opinion whether a rule has been violated or not, the question must be determined before the application of the rule can be insisted upon. Such a question is usually decided upon by the presiding officer, without debate; but any member may appeal from his decision, and demand a vote of the house on the matter. A question of order is debatable, and the presiding officer, contrary to rule in other cases, may participate in the discussion.

10. Reading of Papers.—When papers or documents of any kind are laid before a deliberative assembly, every member has a right to have them read before he can be required to vote upon them. They are generally read by the secretary, on the reading being called for, without the formality of a vote.

11. Withdrawal of a Motion.—Unless there be a rule to that effect, a motion once before the assembly can not be withdrawn without a vote of the house, on a motion to allow its withdrawal.

12. The Suspension of Rules.—When anything is proposed which is forbidden by a special rule, it must be preceded by a motion for the suspension of the rule, which, if there be no standing rule to the contrary, may be carried by a majority of votes; but most deliberative bodies have an established rule on this subject, requiring a fixed proportion of the votes—usually two thirds.

13. The Motion to Reconsider.—The intention of this is to enable an assembly to revise a decision found to be erroneous. The time within which a motion to reconsider may be entertained is generally fixed by a special rule; and the general rule is, that it must emanate from some member who voted with the majority. In Congress, a motion to reconsider takes precedence of all other motions, except the motion to adjourn.

8. Order of Business.

In all permanently organized bodies there should be an order of business, established by a special rule or by-law; but where no such rule or law exists, the president, unless otherwise directed by a vote of the assembly, arranges the business in such order as he may think most desirable. The following is the order of business of the New York Debating Club, referred to in a previous section. It may be easily so modified as to be suitable for any similar society:

1. Call to order. 2. Calling the roll. 3. Reading the minutes of previous meeting. 4. Propositions for membership. 5. Reports of special committee. 6. Balloting for candidates. 7. Reports of standing committee. 8. Secretary's report. 9. Treasurer's report. 10. Reading for the evening. 11. Recitations for the evening. 12. Candidates initiated. 13. Unfinished business. 14. Debate. 15. New business. 16. Adjournment.

9. Order of Debate.

1. A member having got the floor, is entitled to be heard to the end, or till the time fixed by rule has expired; and all interruptions, except a call to order, are not only out of order, but rude in the extreme.

2. A member who temporarily yields the floor to another, is generally permitted to resume as soon as the interruption ceases, but he can not claim to do so as a right.

3. It is neither in order nor in good taste to designate members by name in debate, and they must in no case be directly addressed. Such forms as, "The gentleman who has just taken his seat," or, "The member on the other side of the house," etc., may be made use of to designate persons.

4. Every speaker is bound to confine himself to the question. This rule is, however, very liberally interpreted in most deliberative assemblies.

5. Every speaker is bound to avoid personalities, and to exercise in all respects a courteous and gentlemanly deportment. Principles and measures are to be discussed, and not the motives or character of those who advocate them.[Q]

FOOTNOTE:

[Q] The foregoing rules of order have been mainly condensed from that excellent work, "The American Debater," by James N. McElligott, LL.D., to which the reader is referred for a complete exposition of the whole subject of debating. Published by Ivison and Phinney, New York, and for sale by Fowler and Wells.



XI.

MISCELLANEOUS MATTERS.

These, some will say, are little things. It is true, they are little but it is equally clear that they are necessary things.—Chesterfield.

I.—REPUBLICAN DISTINCTIONS.

We have defined equality in another place. We fully accept the doctrine as there set forth. We have no respect for mere conventional and arbitrary distinctions. Hereditary titles command no deference from us. Lords and dukes are entitled to no respect simply because they are lords and dukes. If they are really noble men, we honor them accordingly. Their titles are mere social fictions.

True republicanism requires that every man shall have an equal chance—that every man shall be free to become as unequal as he can. No man should be valued the less or the more on account of his grandfather, his position, his possessions, or his occupation. The MAN should be superior to the accidents of his birth, and should take that rank which is due to his merit.[R]

The error committed by our professedly republican communities consists, not in the recognition of classes and grades of rank, but in placing them, as they too often do, on artificial and not on natural grounds. We have had frequent occasion, in the preceding pages, to speak of superiors and inferiors. We fully recognize the relation which these words indicate. It is useless to quarrel with Nature, who has nowhere in the universe given us an example of the absolute, unqualified, dead-level equality which some pseudo-reformers have vainly endeavored to institute among men. Such leveling is neither possible nor desirable. Harmony is born of difference, and not of sameness.

We have in our country a class of toad-eaters who delight in paying the most obsequious homage to fictitious rank of every kind. A vulgar millionaire of the Fifth Avenue, and a foreign adventurer with a meaningless title, are equally objects of their misplaced deference. Losing sight of their own manhood and self-respect, they descend to the most degrading sycophancy. We have little hope of benefiting them. They are "joined to their idols; let them alone."

But a much larger class of our people are inclined to go to the opposite extreme, and ignore veneration, in its human aspect, altogether. They have no reverence for anybody or anything. This class of people will read our book, and, we trust, profit by its well-meant hints. We respect them, though we can not always commend their manners. They have independence and manliness, but fail to accord due respect to the manhood of others. It is for their special benefit that we leave touched with considerable emphasis on the deference due to age and genuine rank, from whatever source derived.

Your townsman, Mr. Dollarmark, has no claim on you for any special token of respect, simply because he inherited half a million, which has grown in his hands to a million and a half, while you can not count half a thousand, or because he lives in his own palatial mansion, and you in a hired cottage; but your neighbor, Mr. Anvil, who, setting out in life, like yourself, without a penny, has amassed a little fortune by his own unaided exertions, and secured a high social position by his manliness, integrity, and good breeding, is entitled to a certain deference on your part—a recognition of his merits and his superiority. Mr. Savant, who has gained distinction for himself and conferred honor on his country by his scientific discoveries, and your aged friend Mr. Goodman, who, though a stranger to both wealth and fame, is drawing toward the close of a long and useful life, during which he has helped to build up and give character to the place in which he lives, have, each in his own way, earned the right to some token of deference from those who have not yet reached an equally elevated position.

It is not for birth, or wealth, or occupation, or any other accidental circumstance, that we ask reverence, but for inherent nobility wrought out in life. This is what should give men rank and titles in a republic.

Your hired man, Patrick, may be your inferior, but it is not because he is your hired man. Another man, who is your superior in every way, may stand in the same business relation to you. He may sell you certain stipulated services for a stipulated amount of money; but you bargain for no deference that your real social position and character do not call for from him. He, and not you, may be entitled to the "wall side," and to precedence everywhere.

II.—CITY AND COUNTRY.

The words civil and civilized are derived from the Latin civitas (Ital., citta), a city, and polite, from the Greek [Greek: polis] (polis), a city; because cities are the first to become civilized, or civil, and polite, or polished (Latin, polire). They are still, as a general rule, the home of the most highly cultivated people, as well as of the rudest and most degraded, and unquestioned arbiters of fashion and social observances. For this reason the rules of etiquette laid down in this and all other works on the subject of manners, are calculated, as the astronomers say, for the meridian of the city. The observances of the country are borrowed from the city, and modified to suit the social condition and wants of the different localities. This must always be borne in mind, and your behavior regulated accordingly. The white or pale yellow gloves, which you must wear during the whole evening at a fashionable evening party in the city, under pain of being set down as unbearably vulgar, would be very absurd appendages at a social gathering at a farm-house in the country. None but a snob would wear them at such a place. So with other things.

III.—IMPORTED MANNERS.

N. P. Willis says, "We should be glad to see a distinctly American school of good manners, in which all useless etiquette were thrown aside, but every politeness adopted or invented which could promote sensible and easy exchanges of good-will and sociability. Good sense and consideration for others should be the basis of every usage of polite life that is worth regarding. Indeed, we have long thought that our country was old enough to adopt measures and etiquettes of its own, based, like all other politeness, upon benevolence and common sense. To get rid of imported etiquette is the first thing to do for American politeness."

This is an important truth well stated. We have had enough of mere imported conventionalism in manners. Our usages should not be English or French usages, further than English and French usages are founded on universal principles. Politeness is the same everywhere and always, but the forms of etiquette must change with times and places; for an observance which may be proper and useful in London or Paris, may be abundantly absurd in New York.

IV.—FICTITIOUS TITLES.

In answer to a correspondent who inquires whether an American citizen should address a European nobleman by his title, Life Illustrated says:

"We answer, unhesitatingly, No. Most of the European titles are purely fictitious, as well as ridiculous. The Duke of Northumberland, for example, has nothing in particular to do with Northumberland, nor does he exercise dukeship (or leadership) over anything except his private estate. The title is a perfect absurdity; it means nothing whatever; it is a mere nickname; and Mr. Percy is a fool for permitting himself to be addressed as 'My Lord Duke,' and 'Your Grace.' Indeed, even in England, gentlemen use those titles very sparingly, and servants alone habitually employ then. American citizens who are thrown, in their travels, or in their intercourse with society, into communication with persons bearing titles, may treat them with all due respect without Gracing or My-Lording them. In our opinion, they should do so. And we have faith enough in the good sense of the English people to believe that the next generation, or the next but one, will see a general abandonment of fictitious titles by the voluntary action of the very people who hold them. At the same time, we are inclined to think that the bestowment of real titles—titles which mean something, titles given in recognition of distinguished worth and eminent services, titles not hereditary—will be one of the most cherished prerogatives of the enlightened states of the good time coming. The first step, however, must be the total abolition of all titles which are fictitious and hereditary."

V.—A MIRROR FOR CERTAIN MEN.

The following rather broad hints to certain bipeds who ought to be gentlemen, were clipped from some newspaper. We are sorry we do not know to whom to credit the article:

"Who can tell why women are expected, on pain of censure and avoidance, to conform to a high standard of behavior, while men are indulged in another a great deal lower? We never could fully understand why men should be tolerated in the chewing of tobacco, in smoking and in spitting everywhere almost, and at all times, whereas a woman can not do any of these things without exciting aversion and disgust. Why ought a man to be allowedly so self-indulgent, putting his limbs and person in all manner of attitudes, however uncouth and distasteful, merely because such vulgarities yield him temporary eases, while a woman is always required to preserve an attitude, if not of positive grace, at least of decency and propriety, from which if she departs, though but for an instant, she forfeits respect, and is instantly branded as a low creature!

"Can any one say why a man when he has the tooth-ache, or is called to suffer in any other way, should be permitted, as a matter of course, to groan and bellow, and vent his feelings very much in the style of an animal not endowed with reason, while a woman similarly suffering must bear it in silence and decorum? Why, should men, as a class, habitually, and as a matter of right, boldly wear the coarsest qualities of human nature on the outside, and swear and fight, and beastify themselves, so that they are obliged to be put into separate pens in the cars on railroads, and at the depots, while woman must appear with an agreeable countenance, if not in smiles, even when the head, or perhaps the heart, aches, and are expected to permit nothing ill-tempered, disagreeable, or even unhappy to appear outwardly, but to keep all these concealed in their own bosoms to suffer as they may, lest they might otherwise lessen the cheerfulness of others?

"These are a few suggestions only among many we would hint to the stronger and more exciting sex to be reflected on for the improvement of their tastes and manners. In the mirror thus held up before them, they can not avoid observing the very different standards by which the behavior of the two sexes is constantly regulated. If any reason can be assigned why one should always be a lady, and the other hardly ever a gentleman, we hope it will be done."

VI.—WASHINGTON'S CODE OF MANNERS.

Every action ought to be with some sign of respect to those present. Be no flatterer; neither play with any one who delights not to be played with. Read no paper or book in company. Come not near the papers or books of another when he is writing. Let your countenance be cheerful; but in serious matters be grave. Let your discourse with others, on matters of business, be short. It is good manners to let others speak first. When a man does all he can, do not blame him, though he succeeds not well. Take admonitions thankfully. Be not too hasty to receive lying reports to the injury of another. Let your dress be modest, and consult your condition. Play not the peacock by looking vainly at yourself. It is better to be alone than in bad company. Let your conversation be without malice or envy. Urge not your friend to discover a secret. Break not a jest where none take pleasure in mirth. Gaze not on the blemishes of others. When another speaks, be attentive.

VII.—MARKED PASSAGES.

On turning over the leaves of the various works on etiquette which we have had occasion to consult in the preparation of this little manual, we have marked with our pencil a large number of passages which seemed to us to embody important facts or thoughts, with the hope of being able to weave them into our work, each in its appropriate place. Some of them we have made use of according to our original intention; a few others not elsewhere used, we purpose to throw together here without any attempt at classification.

1. Our Social Uniform.

The universal partiality of our countrymen for black, as the color of dress clothes, at least, is frequently remarked upon by foreigners. Among the best dressed men on the Continent, as well as in England, black, through not confined to the clergy, is in much less general use than here. They adopt the darker shades of blue, brown, and green, and for undress almost as great diversity of colors as of fabrics.

2. A Hint to the Ladies.

Don't make your rooms gloomy. Furnish them for light and let them have it. Daylight is very cheap, and candle or gas light you need not use often. If your rooms are dark, all the effect of furniture, pictures, walls, and carpets is lost. Finally, if you have beautiful things, make them useful. The fashion of having a nice parlor, and then shutting it up all but three or four days in the year, when you have company; spending your own life in a mean room, shabbily furnished, or an unhealthy basement, to save your things, is the meanest possible economy. Go a little further—shut up your house, and live in a pig-pen! The use of nice and beautiful things is to act upon your spirit—to educate you and make you beautiful.

3. Another.

Don't put your cards around the looking-glass, unless in your private boudoir. If you wish to display them, keep them in a suitable basket or vase on the mantle or center-table.

4. An Obliging Disposition.

Polite persons are necessarily obliging. A smile is always on their lips, an earnestness in their countenance, when we ask a favor of them. They know that to render a service with a bad grace, is in reality not to render it at all. If they are obliged to refuse a favor, they do it with mildness and delicacy; they express such feeling regret that they still inspire us with gratitude; in short, their conduct appears so perfectly natural that it really seems that the opportunity which is offered them of obliging us, is obliging themselves; and they refuse all our thanks, without affectation or effort.

5. Securing a Home.

Let me, as a somewhat scrutinizing observer of the varying phases of social life, in our own country especially, enter my earnest protest against the practice so commonly adopted by newly-married persons, of boarding, in place of at once establishing for themselves the distinctive and ennobling prerogatives of HOME. Language and time would alike fail me in an endeavor to set forth the manifold evils inevitably growing out of this fashionable system. Take the advice of an old man, who has tested theories by prolonged experience, and at once establish your PENATES within four walls, and under a roof that will, at times, exclude all who are not properly denizens of your household, upon assuming the rights and obligations of married life. Do not be deterred from this step by the conviction that you can not shrine your home deities upon pedestals of marble. Cover their bases with flowers—God's free gift to all—and the plainest support will suffice for them if it be but firm.

6. Taste vs. Fashion.

A lady should never, on account of economy, wear either what she deems an ugly or an ungraceful garment; such garments never put her at her ease, and are neglected and cast aside long before they have done her their true service. We are careful only of those things which suit us, and which we believe adorn us, and the mere fact of believing that we look well, goes a great way toward making us do so. Fashion should be sacrificed to taste, or, at best, followed at a distance; it does not do to be entirely out, nor completely in, what is called "fashion," many things being embraced under that term which are frivolous, unmeaning, and sometimes meretricious.

7. Special Claims.

There are persons to whom a lady or gentleman should be especially polite. All elderly persons, the unattractive, the poor, and those whose dependent positions may cause them to fear neglect. The gentleman who offers his arm or gives his time to an old lady, or asks a very plain one to dance, or attends one who is poorly dressed, never looses in others' estimation or his own.

8. Propriety of Deportment.

Propriety of deportment is the valuable result of a knowledge of one's self, and of respect for the rights of others; it is a feeling of the sacrifices which are imposed on self-esteem by our social relations; it is, in short, a sacred requirement of harmony and affection.

9. False Pride.

False pride and false dignity are very mean qualities. A true gentleman will do anything proper for him to do. He can soil his hands or use his muscles when there is occasion. The truest gentleman is more likely to carry home a market-basket, or a parcel, or to wheel a barrow through Broadway, than many a conceited little snob of a shop-boy.

10. The Awkwardness of being "Dressed."

When dressed for company, strive to appear as easy and natural as if you were in undress. Nothing is more distressing to a sensitive person, or more ridiculous to one gifted with an esprit moquer [a disposition to "make fun"], than to see a lady laboring under the consciousness of a fine gown; or a gentleman who is stiff, awkward, and ungainly in a brand-new coat.

FOOTNOTE:

[R] Life Illustrated.



XII.

MAXIMS FROM CHESTERFIELD.

The pages of the "Noble Oracle" are replete with sound advice, which all may receive with profit. Genuine politeness is the same always and everywhere.—Madame Bienceance.

1. Cheerfulness and Good Humor.

It is a wonderful thing that so many persons, putting in claims to good breeding, should think of carrying their spleen into company, and entertaining those with whom they converse with a history of their pains, head-aches, and ill-treatment. This is, of all others, the meanest help to social happiness; and a man must have a very mean opinion of himself, who, on having detailed his grievances, is accosted by asking the news. Mutual good-humor is a dress in which we ought to appear, whenever we meet; and we ought to make no mention of ourselves, unless it be in matters wherein our friends ought to rejoice. There is no real life but cheerful life; therefore valetudinarians should be sworn before they enter into company not to say a word of themselves until the meeting breaks up.

2. The Art of Pleasing.

The art of pleasing is a very necessary one to possess, but a very difficult one to acquire. It can hardly be reduced to rules; and your own good sense and observation will teach you more of it than I can. Do as you would be done by, is the surest method that I know of pleasing. Observe carefully what pleases you in others, and probably the same things in you will please others. If you are pleased with the complaisance and attention of others to you, depend upon it the same complaisance and attention, on your part, will equally please them. Take the tone of the company you are in, and do not pretend to give it; be serious or gay, as you find the present humor of the company. This is an attention due from every individual to the majority.

3. Adaptation of Manners.

Ceremony resembles that base coin which circulates through a country by the royal mandate. It serves every purpose of real money at home, but is entirely useless if carried abroad. A person who should attempt to circulate his native trash in another country would be thought either ridiculous or culpable. He is truly well-bred who knows when to value and when to despise those national peculiarities which are regarded by some with so much observance. A traveler of taste at once perceives that the wise are polite all the world over, but that fools are polite only at home.

4. Bad Habits.

Keep yourself free from strange tricks or habits, such as thrusting on your tongue, continually snapping your fingers, rubbing your hands, sighing aloud, gaping with a noise like a country fellow that has been sleeping in a hay-loft, or indeed with any noise; and many others that I have noticed before. These are imitations of the manners of the mob, and are degrading to a gentleman. It is rude and vulgar to lean your head back and destroy the appearance of fine papered walls.

5. Do what You are About.

Hoc age was a maxim among the Romans, which means, "Do what you are about, and do that only." A little mind is hurried by twenty things at once; but a man of sense does but one thing at a time, and resolves to excel in it; for whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well. Therefore, remember to give yourself up entirely to the thing you are doing, be it what it may, whether your book or your play; for if you have a right ambition, you will desire to excel all boys of your age, at cricket, at trap-ball, as well as in learning.

6. People who never Learn.

There have been people who have frequented the first companies all their lifetime, and yet have never divested themselves of their natural stiffness and awkwardness; but have continued as vulgar as if they were never out of a servants' hall. This has been owing to carelessness, and a want of attention to the manners and behavior of others.

7. Conformity to Local Manners.

Civility, which is a disposition to accommodate and oblige others, is essentially the same in every country; but good-breeding, as it is called, which is the manner of exerting that disposition, is different in almost every country, and merely local; and every man of sense imitates and conforms to that local good-breeding or the place which he is at.

8. How to Confer Favors.

The greatest favors may be done so awkwardly and bunglingly as to offend; and disagreeable things may be done so agreeably as almost to oblige. Endeavor to acquire this great secret. It exists, it is to be found, and is worth a great deal more than the grand secret of the alchymists would be, if it were, as it is not, to be found.

9. Fitness.

One of the most important points of life is decency, which means doing what is proper, and where it is proper; for many things are proper at one time, and in one place, that are extremely improper in another. Read men, therefore, yourself, not in books, but in nature. Adopt no systems, but study them yourself.

10. How to Refuse.

A polite manner of refusing to comply with the solicitations of a company is also very necessary to be learned; for a young man who seems to have no will of his own, but does everything that is asked of him, may be a very good-natured, but he is a very silly, fellow.

11. Civility to Women.

Civility is particularly due to all women; and remember that no provocation whatsoever can justify any man in not being civil to every woman; and the greatest man in the world would be justly reckoned a brute, if he were not civil to the meanest woman.

12. Spirit.

Spirit is now a very fashionable word. To act with spirit, to speak with spirit, means only to act rashly, and to talk indiscreetly. An able man shows his spirit by gentle words and resolute actions; he is neither hot nor timid.



XIII.

ILLUSTRATIVE ANECDOTES.

It is well to combine amusement with instruction, whether you write for young or old.—Anonymous.

I.—ELDER BLUNT AND SISTER SCRUB.

The house of the excellent Squire Scrub was the itinerant's home; and a right sweet, pleasant home it would have been but for a certain unfortunate weakness of the every other way excellent Sister Scrub. The weakness I allude to was, or at least it was suspected to be, the love of praise. Now the good sister was really worthy of high praise, and she often received it; but she had a way of disparaging herself and her performances which some people thought was intended to invite praise. No housewife kept her floors looking so clean and her walls so well whitewashed as she. Every board was scrubbed and scoured till further scrubbing and scouring would have been labor wasted. No one could look on her white ash floor and not admire the polish her industry gave it. The "Squire" was a good provider, and Sister Scrub was an excellent cook; and so their table groaned under a burden of good things on all occasions when good cheer was demanded. And yet you could never enter the house and sit half an hour without being reminded that "Husband held Court yesterday, and she couldn't keep the house decent." If you sat down to eat with them, she was sorry she "hadn't anything fit to eat." She had been scrubbing, or washing, or ironing, or she had been half sick, and she hadn't got such and such things that she ought to have. Nor did it matter how bountiful or how well prepared the repast really was, there was always something deficient, the want of which furnished a text for a disparaging discourse on the occasion. I remember once that we sat down to a table that a king might have been happy to enjoy. There was the light snow-white bread; there were the potatoes reeking in butter; there were chickens swimming in gravy; there were the onions and the turnips, and I was sure Sister Scrub had gratified her ambition for once. We sat down, and a blessing was asked; instantly the good sister began; she was afraid her coffee was too much burned, or that the water had been smoked, or that she hadn't roasted the chicken enough. There ought to have been some salad, and it was too bad that there was nothing nice to offer us.

We, of course, endured those unjustifiable apologies as well as the could, simply remarking that everything was really nice, and proving by our acts that the repast was tempting to our appetites.

I will now introduce another actor to the reader—Elder Blunt, the circuit preacher. Elder Blunt was a good man. His religion was of the most genuine, experimental kind. He was a very plain man. He, like Mr. Wesley, would no more dare to preach a fine sermon than wear a fine coat. He was celebrated for his common-sense way of exhibiting the principles of religion. He would speak just what he thought, and as he felt. He somehow got the name of being an eccentric preacher, as every man, I believe, does who never prevaricates, and always acts and speaks as he thinks. Somehow or other, Elder Blunt had heard of Sister Scrub, and that infirmity of hers, and he resolved to cure her. On his first round he stopped at "Squire Scrub's," as all other itinerants had done before him. John, the young man, took the elder's horse and put him in the stable, and the preacher entered the house. He was shown into the best room, and soon felt very much at home. He expected to hear something in due time disparaging the domestic arrangements, but he heard it sooner than he expected. This time, if Sister Scrub could be credited, her house was all upside down; it wasn't fit to stay in, and she was sadly mortified to be caught in such a plight. The elder looked all around the room, as if to observe the terrible disorder, but he said not a word. By-and-by the dinner was ready, and the elder sat down with the family to a well spread table. Here, again, Sister Scrub found everything faulty; the coffee wasn't fit to drink, and she hadn't anything fit to eat. The elder lifted his dark eye to her face; for a moment he seemed to penetrate her very soul with his austere gaze; then slowly rising from the table, he said, "Brother Scrub, I want my horse immediately; I must leave!"

"Why, Brother Blunt, what is the matter?"

"Matter? Why, sir, your house isn't fit to stay in, and you haven't anything fit to eat or drink, and I won't stay."

Both the "Squire" and his lady were confounded. This was a piece of eccentricity entirely unlooked for. They were stupefied. But the elder was gone. He wouldn't stay in a house not fit to stay in, and where there wasn't anything fit to eat and drink.

Poor Sister Scrub! She wept like a child at her folly. She "knew it would be all over town," she said, "and everybody would be laughing at her." And then, how should she meet the blunt, honest elder again? "She hadn't meant anything by what she had said." Ah! she never thought how wicked it was to say so much that didn't mean anything.

The upshot of the whole matter was, that Sister Scrub "saw herself as others saw her." She ceased making apologies, and became a wiser and better Christian. Elder Blunt always puts up there, always finds everything as it should be, and, with all his eccentricities, is thought by the family the most agreeable, as he is acknowledged by everybody to be the most consistent, of men.—Rev. J. V. Watson.

II.—THE PRESENCE.

Mr. Johnson, an English traveler, relates, in his notes on North America, the following story:

"At Boston," he says, "I was told of a gentleman in the neighborhood who, having a farm servant, found him very satisfactory in every respect, except that he invariably came into his employer's room with his hat on.

"'John,' said he to the man one day, 'you always keep your hat on when you come into the room.'

"'Well, sir,' said John, 'and haven't I a right to?'

"'Yes,' was his employer's reply, 'I suppose you have.'

"'Well,' said John, 'if I have a right to, why shouldn't I?'

"This was a poser from one man to another, where all have equal rights. So, after a moment's reflection the gentleman asked:

"'Now, John, what will you take, how much more wages will you ask, to take off your hat whenever you come in?'

"'Well, that requires consideration, I guess,' said the man.

"'Take the thing into consideration, then,' rejoined the employer, 'and let me know to-morrow morning.'

"The morrow comes, and John appears.

"'Well, John, have you considered what additional wages you are to have for taking your hat off?'

"'Well, sir, I guess it's worth a dollar a month.'

"'It's settled, then, John; you shall have another dollar a month.'

"So the gentleman retained a good man, while John's hat was always in his hand when he entered the house."

This story, to one who knows New England, is not altogether incredible. Toward the democratization of this country, yet most incomplete, it will perhaps be one day conceded that the South has contributed ideas, and New England sentiment; while the Great West will have made a partial application of both to the conduct of life. The Yankees are the kindest and the acutest of our people, and the most ungraceful. Nowhere in the world is there so much good feeling, combined with so much rudeness of manner, as in New England. The South, colonized by Cavaliers, retains much of the Cavalier improvidence and careless elegance of manner; and Southerners, like the soil they till, are generous. But the Yankees, descended from austere and Puritanic farmers, and accustomed to wring their subsistence from an unwilling soil, possess the sterling virtues of human nature along with a stiff-jointed awkwardness of manner, and a sharp angularity of thought, which renders them unpleasing even to those who respect them most. A Yankee seldom ceases to be provincial.

But John is waiting, hat in hand, to hear what we have to say respecting his case.

We say that John was wrong in not taking off his hat voluntarily, but that the feeling which prevented his doing so was right. He was right in feeling that the accidental circumstance of his being a hired man gave his employer no claim to any special mark of respect from him; and, as he considered that the removal of his hat would have been a special mark of respect, and thus an acknowledgment of social inferiority, he declined to make that acknowledgment. But John was mistaken. The act referred to would not have borne such an interpretation. John ought to have felt that on coming into the presence of a man, a fellow-citizen and co-sovereign, and particularly on entering his abode, one of the innumerable royal residences of the country, some visible sign of respect, some kind of deferential salutation, is due from the person entering. John should have risen superior to the mere accident of his position, and remembered only that he and his employer were men and equals. The positions of the two men might be reversed in a day; their equality as men and citizens, nothing but crime could affect.—James Parton.

III.—A LEARNED MAN AT TABLE.

Some of the many errors which are liable to be committed through ignorance of usage, are pleasantly pointed out in the following story, which is related by a French writer:

The Abbe Cosson, professor in the College Mazarin, thoroughly accomplished in the art of teaching, saturated with Greek, Latin, and literature, considered himself a perfect well of science: he had no conception that a man who knew all Persius and Horace by heart could possibly commit an error—above all, an error at table. But it was not long before he discovered his mistake. One day, after dining with the Abbe de Radonvilliers at Versailles, in company with several courtiers and marshals of France; he was boasting of the rare acquaintance with etiquette and custom which he had exhibited at dinner. The Abbe Delille, who heard this eulogy upon his own conduct, interrupted his harangue by offering to wager that he had committed at least a hundred improprieties at the table. "How is it possible?" exclaimed Cosson. "I did exactly like the rest of the company."

"What absurdity!" said the other. "You did a thousand things which no one else did. First, when you sat down at the table, what did you do with your napkin?" "My napkin! why, just what everybody else did with theirs. I unfolded it entirely, and fastened it to my button-hole." "Well, my dear friend," said Delille, "you were the only one that did that, at all events. No one hangs up his napkin in that style; they are contented with placing it on their knees. And what did you do when you took soup?" "Like the others, I believe. I took any spoon in one hand and my fork in the other—" "Your fork! Who ever ate soup with a fork? But to proceed: after your soup, what did you eat?" "A fresh egg." "And what did you do with the shell?" "Handed it to the servant who stood behind my chair." "Without breaking it, of course?" "Well, my dear Abbe, nobody ever eats an egg without breaking the shell." "And after your egg—?" "I asked the Abbe Radonvilliers to send me a piece of the hen near him." "Bless my soul! a piece of the hen! You never speak of hens excepting in the barn-yard. You should have asked for fowl, or chicken. But you say nothing of your mode of drinking." "Like all the rest, I asked for claret and champagne." "Let me inform you, then, that persons always ask for claret wine and champagne wine. But tell me, how did you eat your bread?" "Surely I did that properly. I cut it with my knife in the most regular manner possible." "Bread should always be broken, not cut. But the coffee, how did you manage it?" "It was rather too hot, and I poured a little of it into my saucer." "Well, you committed here the greatest fault of all. You should never pour your coffee into the saucer, but always drink it from the cup." The poor Abbe was confounded. He felt that though one might be master of the seven sciences, yet that there was another species of knowledge which, if less dignified, was equally important.

This occurred many years ago, but there is not one of the observances neglected by the Abbe Cosson which is not enforced with equal rigidness in the present day.

IV.—ENGLISH WOMEN IN HIGH LIFE.

Lord Hardwicke's family consists of his countess, his eldest son (about eighteen or twenty, Lord Royston by courtesy), three of the finest-looking daughters you ever saw, and several younger sons. The daughters—Lady Elizabeth, Lady Mary, and Lady Agnita—are surpassingly beautiful; such development—such rosy cheeks, laughing eyes, and unaffected manners—you rarely see combined. They take a great deal of out-door exercise, and came aboard the Merrimac, in a heavy rain, with Irish shoes thicker soled than you or I ever wore, and cloaks and dresses almost impervious to wet. They steer their father's yacht, walk the Lord knows how many miles, and don't care a cent about rain, besides doing a host of other things that would shock our ladies to death; and yet in the parlor are the most elegant looking women, in their satin shoes and diamonds, I ever saw.... After dinner the ladies play and sing for us, and the other night they got up a game of blind-man's-buff; in which the ladies said we had the advantage, inasmuch as their "petticoats rustled so that they were easily caught." They call things by their names here. In the course of the game, Lord Hardwicke himself was blindfolded, and, trying to catch some one, fell over his daughter's lap on the floor, when two or three of the girls caught him by the legs and dragged his lordship—roaring with laughter, as we all were—on his back into the middle of the floor. Yet they are perfectly respectful, but appear on a perfect equality with each other.—Letter from an Officer of the "Merrimac."

V.—"VIL YOU SAY SO, IF YOU PLEASE?"

"Speaking of not speaking," said I, when the general amusement had abated, "reminds me of an amusing little scene that I once witnessed in the public parlor of a New England tavern, where I was compelled to wait several hours for a stage-coach. Presently there entered a bustling, sprightly-looking little personage, who, after frisking about the room, apparently upon a tom of inspection, finally settled herself very comfortably in the large cushioned rocking-chair—the only one in the room—and was soon, as I had no reason to doubt, sound asleep. It was not long, however, before a noise of some one entering aroused her, and a tall, gaunt, old Yankee woman, hung around with countless bags, bonnet-boxes, and nondescript appendages of various sizes and kinds, presented herself to our vision. After slowly relieving herself of the numberless incumbrances that impeded her progress in life, she turned to a young man who accompanied her, and said, in a tone so peculiarly shrill that it might have been mistaken, at this day, for a railroad whistle—

"'Now, Jonathan, don't let no grass grow under your feet while you go for them toothache drops; I am a'most crazy with pain!' laying a hand upon the affected spot as she spoke; 'and here,' she called out, as the door was closing upon her messenger, 'just get my box filled at the same time,' diving with her disengaged hand into the unknown depths of, seemingly, the most capacious of pockets, and bringing to light a shining black box of sufficient size to hold all the jewels of a modern belle. 'I thought I brought along my snuff-bladder, but I don't know where I put it, my head is so stirred up.'

"By this time the little woman in the rocking-chair was fairly aroused, and rising, she courteously offered her seat to the stranger, her accent at once betraying her claim to be ranked with the politest of nations (a bow, on my part, to the fair foreigner in the group). With a prolonged stare, the old woman coolly ensconced herself in the vacated seat, making not the slightest acknowledgment of the civility she had received. Presently she began to groan, rocking herself furiously at the same time. The former occupant of the stuffed chair, who had retired to a window and perched herself in one of a long row of wooden seats, hurried to the sufferer. 'I fear, madame,' said she, 'that you suffare ver' much—vat can I do for you?' The representative of Yankeedom might have been a wooden clock-case for all the response she made to this amiable inquiry, unless her rocking more furiously than ever might be construed into a reply.

"The little Frenchwoman, apparently wholly unable to class so anomalous a specimen of humanity, cautiously retreated.

"Before I was summoned away, the toothache drops and the snuff together (both administered in large doses) seemed to have gradually produced the effect of oil poured upon troubled waters.

"The sprightly Frenchwoman again ventured upon the theater of action.

"'You find yourself now much improved, madame?' she asked, with considerable vivacity. A very slight nod was the only answer.

"'And you feel dis fauteuil really very com-for-ta-ble?' pursued the little woman, with augmented energy of voice. Another nod was just discernible.

"No intonation of mine can do justice to the very ecstasy of impatience with which the pertinacious questioner actually screamed out:

"'Bien, madame, vil you say so, if you please?'

"Henry Lunettes."

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HOW TO PAINT.

"EVERY MAN HIS OWN PAINTER."

How to Paint.—A complete Compendium of the Art. Designed for the use of Tradesmen, Mechanics, Merchants, Farmers, and a Guide to the Professional Painter. Containing a plain Common-sense statement of the Methods employed by Painters to produce satisfactory results in Plain and Fancy Painting of every Description, including Gilding, Bronzing, Staining, Graining, Marbling, Varnishing, Polishing, Kalsomining, Paper Hanging, Striping, Lettering, Copying and Ornamenting, with Formulas for Mixing Paint in Oil or Water. Description of Pigments used; their Average Cost, Tools required, etc. By F. B. GARDNER, author of the Carriage Painter's Manual. 127 pp. Cloth, $1.00.

This is just the work needed by every person who has anything to paint, as will be seen from the following from the Table of Contents. It is very complete, and will make "Every Man his Own Painter."

CHAPTER I.—PAINTING—Tools used.

CHAPTER II.—BRUSHES.

CHAPTER III.—DRY COLORS—White Lead; Fine White; Lamp Black; Drop Black; Ivory Black; Prussian Blue; Ultramarine Green; Yellow; Vermilion; Brown; Lake; Carmine; Rose Pink; Whiting; Glue; Pumice Stone; Asphaltum.

CHAPTER IV.—LIQUIDS—Spirits of Turpentine; Oils; Varnishes; Furniture Varnish; Average Prices of Varnish; Shellac Varnish; Japan Gold Size; Brown Japan Size; Fat Oil Size; Quick Size; Asphaltum Size; Honey Size; Size for Glass.

CHAPTER V.—COLORS IN OIL—Tube Colors; Compound Colors.

CHAPTER VI.—Mixing Paint; White Paint; White for Inside Work; China Glass; Oil Color for Outside Work; Dead, or Flat Color; Colors Ground in Oil. PUTTY—Common Window Putty; Carriage Painters' Putty; Cementing Putty; Furniture Putty; Hardwood Putty; Putty for Plaster Work.

CHAPTER VII.—MILK PAINT—Distemper Painting; Kalsomine; Preparing Kalsomine; Paint for Out-Buildings; Paint for Iron Railing; White wash; Size for Walls; Paste for Paper hanging; Hanging Paper.

CHAPTER VIII.—Graining; Oak in Distemper; Oak in Oil; Maple; Mahogany; Rosewood; Black Walnut; Staining; Granite; Brown Stone; Portland Stone; Smalting; Flockings; Marbling.

CHAPTER IX.—GILDING—Gold Leaf; Silver Leaf; Dutch Metal; Gilding on Glass; Bronzing; Stenciling; Transferring; Decalcomanie; Transparent Painting; Pearl Inlaying; Making a Rustic Picture; Painting Flower Stand; Polish for Mahogany; Varnishing Furniture; Waxing Furniture; Cleaning Paint; Paint for Farming Tools; Paint for Machinery; Paint for Household Goods; Paint for Iron; To Imitate Ground Glass; Pumicing Ornaments; Painting to Imitate Damask; To Paint a Farm Wagon; To Re-Varnish a Carriage; To Duplicate Plaster Casts; "Putty Work;" Permanent Wood Filling for House Work.

It is neatly Printed, with illustrations showing everything that can be illustrated in connection with the subject. Published in uniform style with the Carriage Painter's Manual, at the same price. $1.00, by mail, past-paid, to any address by B. R. WELLS & CO., Publishers, 737 Broadway, N. Y.

THE EMPHATIC DIAGLOTT,

Containing the Original Greek Text of THE NEW TESTAMENT with an interlineary word-for-word English Translation; a new Emphatic Version based on the Interlineary Translation, on the Readings of Eminent Critics, and on the various Readings of the Vatican Manuscript (No 1,209 in the Vatican Library); together with illustrative and Explanatory Foot Notes, and a copious Selection of References; to the whole of which is added a valuable Alphabetical Index.

By BENJAMIN WILSON.

One Vol., 12mo, 884 pp. Price, extra cloth, $4; Lib. binding, $5.

We have here a Greek Text acknowledged to be one of the best, which Greek scholars will find of importance, while the unlearned have an almost equal chance with those who are acquainted with the original, by having an interlinear, literal, word-for-word English translation. On the right hand of each page there is a column containing a special rendering of the translation, including the labors of many talented critics and translators, and in this column the emphatic signs are noted by which the Greek words of emphasis are designated, which the common and are new version of the New Testament fail to give. The adopting of the ensigns of emphasis give a certainty and intensity to the passages where they occur which can not be had without them. In addition to this there are numerous footnotes and references, making it on the whole one of the most valuable aids to Bible study yet published.

OPINIONS OF THE CLERGY.

The following extracts from a letters received by the publishers will go far to show in what the light the "Emphatic Diaglott" is regarded by the clergy:

From J. R. GRAVES, LL.D., Editor of Tenn. Baptist.—"There are many of our ministers who have mastered the usual amount of Greek required to complete their course at school but have found little time since entering upon their ministerial labors to "keep it up," and rust has so gathered upon their Greek that it has become a labor to work it out without Grammar and Lexicon. To all such and even to those who have accomplished but little in the language, this INTERLINEARY translation will prove an invaluable help. The CRITICAL FOOT-NOTES and Dictionary of Terms at the close are fully worth the price of the work itself. I can cordially commend it to every minister and Bible student as a rigidly faithful translation of the New Testament, and for several reasons the most valuable one that has yet been made."

From THOMAS ARMITAGE, D.D., Pastor of the Fifth Ave. Baptist Church.—"GENTLEMEN: I have examined with much care and great interest the specimen sheets sent me of 'the Emphatic Diaglott.' ... I believe that the book furnishes evidences of the purposed faithfulness, more than usual scholarship, and remarkable literary industry. It can not fail to be an important help to those who wish to become better acquainted with the revealed will of God. For these reasons I wish the enterprise of publishing the work a great success."

From the Rev. JAMES L. HODGE, Pastor of the First Mariners' Baptist Church, N. Y.—"I have examined these sheets which you design to be a specimen of the work, and have to confess myself much pleased with the arrangement and ability of Mr. Wilson.... I can most cordially thank Mr. Wilson for his noble work, and you, gentlemen, for your Christian enterprise in bringing the work before the public. I believe the work will do good, and aid the better understanding of the New Testament."

From Prof. H. MATTISON, Pastor of Trinity Meth. Church, Jersey City, N. J.—... "The plan of the work is admirable, and the presence of the Greek text and interlinear version gives every scholar a fair chance to test the version for himself, verse by verse and word for word. I can not but believe that the work will be valuable acquisition to the Biblical literature of the country."

From A. A. LIVERMORE, D.D., President of the Theological Sem., Meadville, Pa.—... "I welcome all efforts intelligently made to popularize the results of criticism, and wish that this little volume might be possessed by every clergyman and student of the Scriptures in the country."

From Rev. C. LAREW, Pastor of the Halsey St. Meth. Church, Newark, N. J.—"'The Diaglott' has given me great pleasure. The arrangement is a most excellent one, and the new version can not fail to be of gratification and profit, especially to those unacquainted with the original Greek. The translator has certainly shown great genius in seizing upon the thought of the original and a happy tact on presenting it."

From Rev. G. F. WARREN, Pastor of the Worthen St. Church, Lowell, Mass.—... "Am highly gratified with the thorough manner in which he (the author) has done his work. If I mistake not this translation will receive a cordial welcome from the Christian public. It is just what every Christian needs. I congratulate myself and others that such a valuable auxiliary to the study of the Word of God is placed in our hands."

We give sample pages of the work that every one may form a correct idea of the plan of publication. Sent by mail, post-paid, on receipt of price.

Address all orders to FOWLER & WELLS CO. Publishers, 753 BROADWAY, NEW YORK.

GOOD HEALTH BOOKS.

HEALTH IN THE HOUSEHOLD,

Or, Hygienic Cookery. By Susanna W. Dodds, M.D. One large 12mo volume, 600 pages, extra cloth or oil-cloth binding, price $2.00.

Undoubtedly the very best work on the preparation of food in a healthful manner ever published, and one that should be in the hands of all who would furnish their tables with food that is wholesome and at the same time palatable, and will contribute much toward Health in the Household.

THE NATURAL CURE

Of Consumption, Constipation, Bright's Disease, Neuralgia, Rheumatism, "Colds" (Fevers), Etc. How Sickness Originates and How to Prevent it. A Health Manual for the People. By C. E. Page. 1 vol. 12mo. 278 pp., ex. cloth, $1.00.

A new work with new ideas, both radical and reasonable, appealing to the common-sense of the reader. This is not a new work with old thoughts simply restated, but the most original Health Manual published in many years. It is written in the author's clear, attractive manner, and should be in the hands of all who would either retain or regain their health, and keep from the hands of the doctors.

HOW TO FEED THE BABY,

To Make Her Healthy and Happy. With Health Hints. By C. E. Page, M.D. Fourth Edition, Revised and Enlarged. 12mo, paper, 50 cents; extra cloth, 75 cts.

Dr. Page has devoted much attention to the subject, both in this country and in Europe, noting the condition of children, and then making careful inquiries as to the feeding, care, etc., and this work is a special record of experience with his own child. In addition to answering the question what to feed the baby, this volume tells how to feed the baby, which is of equal importance. There are many who are now following the author's teaching with good results.

HOW TO BE WELL;

Or, Common-Sense Medical Hygiene. A book for the people, giving directions for the treatment and cure of acute diseases without the use of drug medicines, also general hints on health. By M. Augusta Fairchild, M.D. 12mo, cloth, $1.00.

We have here a new work on Hygiene containing the results of the author's experience for many years in the treatment of acute and chronic diseases with Hygienic agencies, and it will save an incalculable amount of pain and suffering, as well as doctors' bills, in every family where its simple directions are followed.

DIGESTION and DYSPEPSIA.

A Complete Explanation of the Digestive Processes, with the Symptoms and Treatment of Dyspepsia and other Disorders of the Digestive Organs. Illustrated. By R. T. Trall, M.D. $1.00.

The latest and best work on the subject. With fifty illustrations; showing with all possible fullness every process of digestion, and giving all the causes, and directions for treatment of Dyspepsia. The author gives the summary of the data which he collected during an extensive practice of more than twenty-five years, largely with patients who were suffering from diseases caused by Dyspepsia and an impaired Digestion.

THE MOTHER'S HYGIENIC HANDBOOK,

for the Normal Development and Training of Women and Children, and the Treatment of their diseases with Hygienic agencies. By the same author. $1.00.

The great experience and ability of the author enabled him to give just that advice which mothers need so often all through their lives. It covers the whole ground, and, if it be carefully read, will go far towards giving us an "ENLIGHTENED MOTHERHOOD." The work should be read by every wife and every woman who contemplates marriage. Mothers may place it in the hands of their daughters with words of commendation, and feel assured they will be the better prepared for the responsibilities and duties of married life and motherhood.

Sent by mail, post-paid, to any address on receipt of price. Agents wanted. Address FOWLER & WELLS CO., Publishers. 753 Broadway, New York.

THE WORKS OF NELSON SIZER.

A Great Book for Young People

"CHOICE OF PURSUITS; or, What to Do and Why," describing Seventy-five Trades and Professions, and the Temperaments and Talents required for each; with Portraits and Biographies of many successful Thinkers and Workers By NELSON SIZER, Associate Editor of the "PHRENOLOGICAL JOURNAL," Vice President of, and Teacher in, the "American Institute of Phrenology," etc. 12mo, extra cloth. 508 pp. Price, $1.75.

This work fills a place attempted by no other. Whoever has to earn a living by labor of head or hand, can not afford to do without it.

NOTICES OF THE PRESS.

"'CHOICE OF PURSUITS; or, What to do and Why' is a remarkable book. The author has attained a deserved eminence as a delineator of character. We have given it a careful reading and feel warranted in saying that it is a book calculated to do a vast deal of good."—Boston Commonwealth.

"The title in startling, but it is indicative of the contents of the book itself; the work is a desideratum."—Inter-Ocean (Chicago.)

"It presents many judicious counsels. The main purpose of the writer is to prevent mistakes in the choice of a profession. His remarks on the different trades are often highly original. The tendency of this volume is to increase the reader's respect for human nature."—New York Tribune.

"The design of this book is to indicate to every man his proper work and to educate him for it"—Albany Evening Journal.

A New Book for Parents and Teachers.

"HOW TO TEACH ACCORDING TO TEMPERAMENT AND MENTAL DEVELOPMENT," or, Phrenology in the School-room and the Family.

With many Illustrations. 12mo, extra cloth, 351 pages. Price, $1.50.

One of the greatest difficulties in the training of children arises from not understanding their temperament and disposition. This work points out clearly the constitutious differences, and how to make the most of each.

NOTICES OF THE PRESS.

"The purpose of this work is to aid parents and teachers to understand the talents, dispositions, and temperaments of those under their guidance. This opens a new field to the consideration of the teacher. The text is attractive and a valuable contribution to educational literature. It should be in the library of every parent and teacher."—New England Journal of Education.

"This is an entirely new feature in a book intended for the use of teachers, and must prove of great advantage to them. The text is written in a manner which must attract every reader."—The Methodist.

"No teacher should neglect to read this well-written contribution to the cause of education."—Christian Instructor.

"It abounds in valuable suggestions and counsels derived from many years experience, which can not fail to be of service to all who are engaged in the business of education. The subject is treated in a plain, familiar manner, and adapted to reading in the family as well as in the study of the teacher."—New York Tribune.

"There is a great deal of good sense in the work and all teachers will be glad to welcome it."—The Commonwealth, Boston.

A NEW BOOK FOR EVERYBODY!

FORTY YEARS IN PHRENOLOGY: Embracing Recollections of History, Anecdote, and Experience. 12mo, extra cloth, 413 pages. Price, $1.50.

In this work we have a most interesting record of the author's recollections and experiences during more than forty years as a Practical Phrenologist. The volume is filled with history, anecdotes, and incidents, pathetic, witty, droll, and startling. Every page sparkles with reality, and is packed with facts too good to be lost. This book will be warmly welcomed by every reader, from the boy of twelve to the sage of eighty years.

THOUGHTS ON DOMESTIC LIFE; or, Marriage Vindicated and FREE LOVE EXPOSED. 12mo. Paper, 25 cents.

This work contains a sharp analysis of the social nature, in some respects quite original. Sent by mail, post-paid, to any address. Agents wanted. Address

FOWLER & WELLS CO., Publishers, 753 Broadway, New York.

THE HUMAN VOICE.

ITS ANATOMY, PHYSIOLOGY, PATHOLOGY, THERAPEUTICS, AND TRAINING, WITH RULES OF ORDER FOR LYCEUMS.

BY R. T. TRALL, M.D.

Paper, 50 Cents; Cloth, 75 Cents.

The work comprises, in a clear, concise form, directions for strengthening and improving the voice, overcoming constitutional difficulties, and repairing the abnormal conditions in the organs of articulation as far as they can be remedied. The work contains many illustrations, with full directions for vocal culture and how gestures may become graceful. It contains, for practice, some of the most popular selections, including the best from Dickens, Henry Clay, Pope, and Bancroft, with Poe's "Raven" and the "Bells;" also, "Sheridan's Ride." The chapter devoted to rules of order for public meetings constitutes a CHAIRMAN'S GUIDE, and with a list of debatable subjects, would be considered worth the price of the book by many young men and members of debating societies. Let every young man—and woman, too—prepare themselves for speaking in public when occasion may demand it.

NOTICES.

All who desire to read and speak well, will find this book an excellent guide.—New England Journal of Education.

Any one who desires to improve his voice, should get a copy of this new work. It is a safe guide for the use of all who aim to become good readers and speakers.—New York Weekly.

The work aims at a scientific and thorough treatment of the subject.—Daily Graphic.

This book supplies the greatest want of young persons entering on their oratorical career.—Rural New Yorker.

An excellent guide for those desiring to become good readers or public speakers, for strengthening and improving the voice.—Publishers' Weekly.

A very useful treatise, practical in treatment, and popular in form.—Christian Intelligencer.

It will be an aid to teachers.—National Teachers' Monthly.

It will be found a plain and intelligible guide in theory and practice, to any who desire to improve or excel, and must rely mainly on self-education.—Christian Instructor, and West. United Pres.

Agents wanted to sell this in High Schools, Colleges, etc. Sent by mail, post-paid, on receipt of price. Address

FOWLER & WELLS CO., Publishers, 753 Broadway, New York.

A Choice of Premiums.

The Phrenological Chart.

A handsome symbolical Head, made from new and special drawings designed for the purpose. The pictorial illustrations show the location of each of the phrenological organs and their natural language. The Head is about twelve ins. wide, handsomely lithographed in colors and on heavy plate paper 19 x 24 ins., properly mounted, with rings for hanging or may be framed, and will be very attractive wherever it is seen. Price: $1.00. Is given to the new subscribers, or the Bust Premium.



The Phrenological Bust.

This Bust is made of Plaster of Paris, and so lettered as to show the exact location of each of the Phrenological Organs. The head is nearly life-size, and very ornamental, deserving a place on the centre-table or mantel, in parlor, office or study. This, with the illustrated key which accompanies each Bust, should be in the hands of all who would know "HOW TO READ CHARACTER." Price, $1.00, or given as a Premium to each new subscriber to the JOURNAL or we will send the Chart Premium.

THE PHRENOLOGICAL JOURNAL

Is widely known in America and Europe, having been before the reading world fifty years, and occupying a place in literature exclusively its own, viz., the study of HUMAN NATURE in all its phases, including Phrenology, Physiognomy, Ethnology, Physiology, etc., together with the "SCIENCE OF HEALTH," and no expense will be spared to make it the best publication for general circulation, tending always to make men better physically, mentally, and morally. Parents and teachers should read the JOURNAL, that they may better know how to govern and train their children. Young people should read the JOURNAL, that they may make the most of themselves. It has long met with the hearty approval of the press and the people.

N. Y. Times says: "THE PHRENOLOGICAL JOURNAL proves that the increasing years of a periodical is no reason for its lessening its enterprise or for diminishing its abundance of interesting matter. If all magazines increased in merit as steadily as THE PHRENOLOGICAL JOURNAL, they would deserve in time to show equal evidences of popularity."

Christian Union says: "It is well known as a popular storehouse for useful thought. It teaches men to know themselves and constantly presents matters of the highest interest to intelligent readers, and has the advantage of having always been not only up with the times, but a little in advance. Its popularity shows the result of enterprise and brains."

TERMS.—The JOURNAL is published monthly at $2.40 a year, or 20 cents a Number. To each new subscriber is given either the BUST or CHART Premium described above. When the Premiums are sent, 13 cents extra must be received with each subscription to pay postage on the JOURNAL and the expense of boxing and packing the Bust, which will be sent by express, or No. 2, a smaller size, or the Chart Premium, will be sent by mail, post-paid.

Send amount to P. O. Orders, P. N., Drafts on New York, or in Registered Letters. Postage-stamps will be received. AGENTS WANTED. Send 10 cents for specimen Numbers, Premium List, Posters, etc. Address

FOWLER & WELLS CO., Publishers, 753 Broadway, New York.



HEADS AND FACES: HOW TO STUDY THEM

A Complete Manual of Phrenology and Physiognomy for the People.

By PROF. NELSON SIZER, and H. S. DRAYTON, M.D.

Fully illustrated. Octavo, extra cloth, $1.00; paper edition, 40 cents.

All claim to know something of How to READ Character, but very few understand all the Signs of Character as shown in the Head and Face. The subject is one of great importance, and in this work the authors, Prof. Nelson Sizer, the phrenological examiner at the rooms of Fowler & Wells Co., and Dr. H. S. Drayton, the editor of the Phrenological Journal, have considered it from a practical standpoint, and the subject is so simplified as to be of great interest and easily understood.

The demand for standard publications of low price has increased greatly with the tendency of many bookmakers to meet it. Popular editions of the poets, historians, scientists have fallen in line with the hundreds and thousands of cheap editions of the better classes of novels; and now, in response to the often-expressed want of the studious and curious, we have this voluminous yet very low-priced treatise on "Heads and Faces" from the point of view of Phrenology, Physiognomy, and Physiology. Although so low-priced, as we have noted above, it is no flimsy, patched-up volume, but a careful, honest work, replete with instruction, fresh in thought, suggestive and inspiring. There are nearly two hundred illustrations, exhibiting a great variety of faces, human and animal, and many other interesting features of the much-sided subject that is considered. Taken at length it is one of the most complete books on face-study that has been issued by its publishers, and is a book that must create a demand wherever it is seen. The style in which it has been produced, the excellent paper, good presswork, numerous illustrations, and elegant, engaging cover, make it a phenomenon even in this cheap book day. Sent by mail, post-paid, on receipt of price, 40 cts. AGENTS WANTED.